A flash from the past. At first it was fun and welcoming. Then, when I realised what it was, it was already to late. I tried to run away, but I couldnt stop looking. I tried to scream, but all that came was a smile.
Tomorrow its back. But this time Im prepared. This time I will not fall for the temptation. My focus will be on what is, not what was or what could have been. The truth is that nothing ever could have been. It was just an illusion. I know that now. But the dream is still there. It grows. Futher and futher from reality, but closer and closer to eternity. What if I can never let it go?
My tears are not as cold as they were before. My desperation not as wild. But I pushed them all away and the once who had hope dont anymore, the once who belived has stoped, the places I felt safe, I cant find back to. I dont want their help anymore. They couldnt do it before so I dont trust them to be able to do it now.
Only I can help myself let go of the anger. The anger towards them, and towards myself. Only I can forgive, only I can forget, only I can look at myself in the mirror.
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